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On Shame

I used to say, “I have anxiety.” Over time and with the support of some wonderful people, podcasts, and books and moments spent in sometimes very uncomfortable silence and meditation, I came to a deeper way to understand my difficult emotions: by recognizing that behind anxiety is most often shame. And everyone experiences shame, it’s so very human. But sometimes that shame feels really powerful. Sometimes it’s just so damn loud and its voice drowns out the voices of self-compassion, self-love, and kindness. What happens when instead of having a shouting match with our shame, instead of getting all teacher on our shame, we just sit with it and listen? What if we let shame scream its totally well-thought out, fact-driven ideas at us and then smile back, seeing shame as the sad, hurt little person it is – because our shame is us, but only one part of us – and then we say, “I hear you. That really sucks. I love you?” What would happen then? I don’t know for sure but on this long, quiet subway ride home, I’ll listen, and maybe later I’ll let you know.

5E Adventure Review: The Boneyard

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The Boneyard by Adam Hancock is a one-session D&D 5E adventure for levels 1-4. It’s horror themed, combat-heavy, and a great choice for Halloween season. I ran this adventure earlier this week for my husband and friends, making up a party of three 3rd level PCs. Hancock gives clear suggestions for scaling encounters up, but I found that some of the lower-level encounters worked as written for the group due to their small size and our friends’ limited experience with D&D.

The Boneyard is marketed as a 3-4 hour adventure, but my group is chatty and they take their sweet time with e’rything. Because I obsessively kept pace, we wrapped up in about 5 hours. This brief, atmospheric adventure is only nine pages long and is presented in a clean, well-organized format. The boxed text is concise and descriptive and includes a few NPC quotes, which I always appreciate and find helpful for setting key encounters. I never had trouble finding the information I needed from the module in session.

Minor spoilers below, but not enough to give away any loose ends for my players. And boy were there loose ends. This is my kind of adventure. 

The Adventure:
The Boneyard takes place entirely in a sprawling graveyard and has an excellent hook: the PCs meet annually at The Boneyard to mourn a fallen friend, Valos, who died in a red dragon attack years prior. Or whomever and however the DM wants. Details aside, the PCs return each year on the anniversary of their friend’s death to visit his grave and honor his memory. But when they arrive that night at dusk, things are amiss: the graveyard is locked and under repairs after a recent earthquake which ripped the earth apart and disturbed many of the graves. The PCs meet an unnerving gravekeeper named Drel and get into the graveyard one way or another, only to find that Valos’s grave has been exhumed. There is a haunting encounter here that my players bypassed entirely because they don’t trust nor go near anyone or anything, a byproduct of playing so many one-shots, in which things are never what they appear and someone or something is always trying to kill them. Anyway, it’s a cool encounter and I’m sad it didn’t happen.

The PCs must then investigate the graveyard to determine what happened to Valos’s body and to return his bones to their resting place. They encounter a number of undead creatures in the graveyard, which is sprinkled with horrific clues. The wandering undead table is varied and includes scaled options based on the level of the party, potential story clues, and even Valos’s skeleton and restless spirit. The party meets a number of distinct and compelling NPCs with enough detail to get the DM started with characterization. These include a hired spy who has information on what’s happening in the graveyard and a mysterious woman named Rasha who whispers to them from the shadows of a dusty mausoleum.

The final showdown occurs in a cavernous underground crypt with a cool terrain feature that makes for interesting combat. Turns out the baddies behind the undead scourge have a terrifying “pet” at their defense, which our party’s cleric turned for the duration of combat; good for them, sad for me. The battle was nonetheless epic and did not require modifications to up the flavor or cool factor. I have a habit of altering almost every big bad encounter I run, but this one was already pretty cool. When I ran this adventure, the party included a moon druid, a fighter, and a cleric: a strong and well-balanced group, which was good because this adventure has a lot of combat! Even so, it presents an interesting story, a ton of mystery, and great NPCs. The party kept the culprits alive, creating the potential for recurring villains!

The biggest downside of this adventure is its lack of maps. Still, there were enough details – dimensions, descriptions – that I was able to draw up sufficient maps the morning of the session. For a newer DM, this might be a bit more time-consuming. In addition, I found the villains’ motives to be underdeveloped, a problem I faced when the party decided to keep them alive and interrogate one of them. But because the adventure is so open, this could be developed further; on the other hand, perhaps that’s not so important for your one-shots. One of the strengths of this adventure is its simplicity; details are left open for the DM to decide. On a final note, Hancock includes stats for the grave-keeper, Drel, but they’re not incredibly exciting. Drel is essentially a coward who runs away from every fight, but wouldn’t it be cool for him to have a weird ace up his sleeve? He has a few tricks, but I didn’t find them particularly compelling.

To my surprise, the party didn’t insist that Rasha show or explain herself and so she remains a mystery to them. They did, however, head into town at the end of the adventure and turn in one of villains to the townmaster (they left the other one with Rasha!). It was only then that they learned of the rumors spreading amongst the townspeople: elderly and poor folk going missing and dying suddenly, strange bites on people’s necks. The session ended on a note of uncertainty. They solved one mystery only to learn that something altogether different was going on. And that is what I like most about this adventure: there are two very different storylines happening at once. In my group’s case, this truth came as a dramatic reveal at the end.

Modifications & Notes:
Location: This adventure is highly adaptable and could be set in any modest to large town. I set it in a town called Marrion’s Way, a name I made up the night before the session.

Prop: Before we started, I gave one of the players a letter from a fellow adventurer, addressed to Valos. I aged the paper with coffee and planned to attach it to a bottle of liquor (but ran out of time to buy it). I imagined the players might share a shot at the end of the adventure as their PCs stood over the grave of their friend, his body laid at rest once more. The purpose of this prop was not only immersion but also to give a nudge toward the conclusion of the adventure as written. I have learned that players need nudges. I think it worked? No matter, I liked it.

Valos: To add dramatic flair, I put the PCs’ encounter with Valos in the final battle, so they had to fight their friend’s undead skeleton along with the villains. This seemed more exciting than encountering him in The Boneyard and it saved us time.

Loot: After the final battle, our fighter discovered an ancient relic (a custom set of magical gauntlets commissioned for the guard of a forgotten queen). I liked that there was a pre-written opportunity in the final location to discover something ancient and powerful and decided to make a custom item for one of the players.

In Summary:
Strengths: scaled encounters, clean and attractive layout, well-organized, easy to follow, great hook, compelling NPCs, creepy, interwoven storylines, simple and adaptable
Weaknesses: no maps, undeveloped baddies

Overall Impression:
The Boneyard is a great adventure for low level parties, especially with new DMs. It has mystery, and is well-written and easy to follow. In addition to that, it delivers on its promise of flavorful and interwoven storylines, leaving the narrative open for exploration and play beyond what is presented in its brief nine pages. Make sure to include creepy music, howling wolves and zombie sounds, and candles if you can. This works as a one-shot or thrown into a regular campaign. Highly recommended, especially for this spooky time of year!

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The final showdown
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Letter to Valos
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DM’s assistant, working hard

About the reviewer:
I’ve been playing D&D – primarily as a Dungeon Master – for nearly two years. This review is knowingly shared from a new DM’s perspective. I prefer adventures with a strong investigative and roleplaying focus, am a proud critter, and am always interested in learning and growing as a DM. Running combat effectively and managing pacing are my biggest challenges at this time.

Illustrations: Jeju Island

We had a little love affair with Jeju Island last month. Jeju is a common tourist destination in South Korea and for good reason. It’s not until you leave the noisy, crowded streets of Seoul that you realize you’ve learned to tolerate a low, unrelenting clamor. In comparison, Jeju is tranquil and stunningly quiet. We watched the sunset almost every night to the sound of cicadas and crickets. It was my first time trying naeng guksu, a bowl of tender noodles in cold broth with slices of Jeju black pork and a sweet and sour vinegar tang. Jeju food tastes sweeter and more sour to me than other regional Korean food and I gobbled it all up.

New Vision, New Site

In an effort to pursue and engage with my current creative goals, I’ve started this new website and blog. On the blog, I’ll still provide glimpses into my life as an American expat in Asia, photos and stories from my travels, and random musings on a life fully lived. On top of that, however, will be regular posts about roleplaying, illustration, and other interests. I’m happy that you’ve arrived here in this space and I look forward to the new projects and conversations it may bring.